Being Myself

Story of watching movie at their times...

2011-08-06T10:38:00.000-07:00

Here I am watching movie after a bad day, I thought so, and my mom's elder sister('Thulma') stands beside me and watches the movie, too. Her sound suddenly makes me look at her and give full attention what she had to say. she started telling me the story which I had already heard from her. It was about the movies she and my mom had seen in theater long back when they were teen. At that time, too, they had to work very hard to support thier family. They used to get up early morning, no, it is early than early morning and finish their chores quickly.

They asked their father's permission to visit Pashupatinath temple. My grandfather was strict, very strict. They take bus to the capital, visit the temple and reach theater and enjoy their movie. After the movie, they went back home afraid of their angry old father. With their heartbeat in their mouth they went inside. So, the ordeal of getting beating or scolding from father was over. However, they had to finish their evening chores. After the tiring day, they would sleep as their head hit the pillow.

Their movie experience is much more worthy than mine, now. I can see the soft smile on her face as she remember those old days of her life. It makes me even more happier that she shares such wonderful stories with me.

My wish and its side effects....

2010-08-19T00:50:00.000-07:00

I am in my office in front of a computer's monitor thinking of what to post in my blog. Its just the same cliche that everyone use when they come back to post something new in their blog. But I won't be putting up this anymore now.

Today morning, I was randomly going through our English dailies in office - of course when I had some time to spare. Suddenly, I was amazed to see an image of train - not those ordinary and old kind of trains but new ones. Most amazing was to see the name pasted on it - Kathmandu Express. Wow! is it real? This was my first reaction to what I saw. Then it came to me, it was not real at all. The news was about the feasibility study of metro train in Kathmandu and as expected the study had been halted due to political nuisance (rather use it instead of turmoil or imbalance or anything else). I suddenly had an urge to take a good long trip on it. This can come true if I will be in UK, Japan or elsewhere. However, I wanted to ride on it here, right in my own country. All those thoughts about patriotism, development of Nepal and blah, blah... came in mind. What a dilemma I am living in. I guess it won't never be true in my lifetime. We need a great person like Prithivi Naryan Shah, Abraham Lincoln, Mahatma Gandhi...who can bring change to our country's situation and its people's lives, too.

My wish to ride on the metro is making me wish a lot of things which are not possible right away but not impossible in future to come.

Unknown thoughts

2010-01-31T10:15:00.000-08:00

I am feeling sleepy after using Facebook coz its already midnight. However, I am feeling to post something in my blog after a long time. Before, as I was doing my dishes, I was thinking I should post about the bus ride to my work which is a bit far from where I live. I was thinking about what I saw in the bus. It was a boy, may be 12 or 13 or more, I don't exactly what was his age. He was sitting besides me and our seats were close to the door which was open all the time. The wind was bit of cold to handle. I was wearing a thick jacket and still I was feeling cold. But that kid was only wearing a medium thickness T-shirt. Seeing that I felt pity for him with my head fully filled with different thoughts. But he was all fine. No sign of shivering at all. He was all by himself. Suddenly, I got struck by different feeling which I had never felt. It was not pity. It was not guilt. I don't know till now what happened at that time to me. Right now, I wish I could express what I felt. But I still can't figure it out. Now I got to sleep. Good night.

350 - what is it???

2009-10-23T23:47:00.000-07:00

I am at my home had just returned from a three and half hour cycling. First there was a rally organized by Nepal Development Foundation. It was about some number 350 which I didn't know previously and hadn't gave any interest on it. And, I didn't gave much interest in rally, too, to ask the organizers what is it all about. I was just enjoying the ride. The funny part was that I was wearing the T-shirt provided by organizers with nice and big print of 350 with our country Nepal's flag and globe, nice design. And it was followed by a slogan "Save Our Himalayas". All these came to view when I was back to my home. I became curious about this 350. What is it? What does it signifies? I opened its website 350.org. Clicked what is 350? without wasting any time.

We all know how our climate is changing everyday to worse. Its all because of us which we can not deny and we don't have much time to pay interest in it. All our carelessness, we are inviting a disastrous future for ourselves and our forthcoming generations. What we are doing is that we are increasing the amount of carbon-dioxide(co2)in our environment. It was okay, if the count of it would have been upto 350 parts in million. Since its over that count, we are now facing sudden change in climate changes. Many glaciers have been lost as they have melted away. so it was simple to understand what was happening. But to go back like before is very hard but what we need to think quickly and act upon it.

Today is October 24, 2009 and its "A Global Day of Climate Action". If we use cycle instead of other vehicles which use fossil fuels then it would certainly help in reducing pollution in world. I hope everyone would understand it and apply in their daily life.

Stuck with beliefs and truth

2009-04-09T04:18:00.000-07:00

This is what happens when you have elders who strongly believes in GOD, DEMONs etcetera, etcetera and you hardly believe in these stuffs. I am in middle of these stuffs. I believe partly and sometimes I don't believe at all. I am a science student and I know there are reasons what happens to us and around us. But sometimes science also fails to explain few things. I am aware of this, too.

Whats bugging me is that my elders conclude that everything happens because of supernatural forces and worst than that they believe we all have been suffering due to spells of witch who never wants us to see well. They have been visiting few people who claim God gets into their body and communicate with them - you won't believe that we can converse with that God face-to-face but in little bizarre way as that person's body is shaking a lot. I have also encountered this situation. At that time, a part of me strongly believes it and another just want to laugh at it. There are lot of things I can explain what they do. But I won't coz thinking of that only I feel irritated.

Back to the story. So everyday, my elders starts talking about these stuffs, be it morning, evening or afternoon. And many times, I had scolded them not to talk so much about these stuffs. But they never stopped it. One fine morning, same conversation was going on. I was reading newspaper in which I found a very encouraging and interesting article. So to divert them from the topic, I started to narrate the article. It was about the engineers-father and son- who had designed and completed the Brooklyn Bridge of US. The father, first, thought that the bridge over Brooklyn River, I guess, can be build. But no one cared about it or got interested in it. So, he convinced his son and they teamed up with other engineers to work on it. Unfortunately, due to accident in the bridge, father lost his life and son is paralyzed for life. But the son develops a way to communicate with people with the help of his beloved wife. As he was able to use his hands only ( may be fingers), he taps in his wife's hand and so they communicate with each other.So, he again teamed up with other engineers and started the project once again. And after a long period of 15 years the bridge is completed. And it is still holding on.

So this story made me cry, encouraged me and influenced me with never-die spirit. I liked it very much and guessed my elders liked it, too. But elders are elders. My aunt, just after I finished narrating, told "Bridge got its sacrifice" and "you know, that people sacrifice babies to bridge for its strength". AAgh.....

Long time no posting....

2009-03-21T00:46:00.000-07:00

Its been like ages that I posted any on my very own blog. Its like being blank all that time. My friend suggested me I should post some of my daily events and reveal my inner thoughts, feelings about what I do or what I see. I had many things to post but at this moment nothing special is coming in my mind. I wish I had loads of things to share with all making them laugh or cry or even feel emotionally attached to my post. But wishing for anything ain't enough. I should be posting something. Whenever I am alone, walking on the road, I try to see whats going on around and try to analyze them so I could write something about it. I come up with good points and views but I didn't like to post them. To be honest, I was feeling lazy. I have been lazy for so long. So I promising myself that I am starting again what I had started long time ago with enthusiasm and eagerness at that time. And its all going to be my own views, thoughts, feelings. All me.

Following Mr. Wood

2008-07-09T03:25:00.000-07:00

How does it sound? "A person perception about life, work can alter after reading a book." I was truly amazed when I witnessed it myself, if someone had told me about it, i would not have believed in it. The office where I work is the place where I witnessed it recently. One of my colleague and more than that a good friend was reading this inspirational book "Leaving Microsoft to change the world" by John Wood. Mr. wood have become an idol to my friend. I have not got the chance to read the book but I can tell its truly an inspiring and good one. I am not a good book reader but I will read it one day. So I was telling about my friend. Yesterday, when I was seated in front of my office computer, he appears suddenly with a grin in his face and told me that he was resigning. I was like OK, have you gone mad or something? He told he wanted to be focused with what he and few of his friends have started earlier before joining the office. But I did not see any regrets in his face but he was happy, happier than before. He was simply happy and so determined to fulfill his destiny. At that time I was proud of him and was envious about it and whatsoever, I got to learn a new thing from him.

All the best dude....and thank you.....

If you want to know about this friend of mine then click Salute to Mr. John Wood

fear of interview

2008-05-19T02:35:00.000-07:00

"Oh! my god" was the last thing in my mind when i was called for the interview, today. before that i could hear clearly my hearting thumping and pumping my blood very hard. my mouth was dry, lucky, i had took water...I know what i ve to do or how i should feel before being interviewed, being calm, being confident, etc...heard abt them a lot but its really hard to do such thing in practical moment...i hope my interview was well as i couldn't answer a lot of question which i have studied a long time ago....keeping my fingers crossed......

"Falling Slowly" from Once

2008-04-22T03:57:00.000-07:00

Glen Hansard - Falling Slowly Lyrics

I don't know you
But I want you
All the more for that
Words fall through me
And always fool me
And I can't react
And games that never amount
To more than they're meant
Will play themselves out

Take this sinking boat and point it home
We've still got time
Raise your hopeful voice you have a choice
You've made it now

Falling slowly, eyes that know me
And I can't go back
Moods that take me and erase me
And I'm painted black
You have suffered enough
And warred with yourself
It's time that you won

Take this sinking boat and point it home
We've still got time
Raise your hopeful voice you had a choice
You've made it now

Take this sinking boat and point it home
We've still got time
Raise your hopeful voice you had a choice
You've made it now
Falling slowly sing your melody
I'll sing along

Once

2008-04-15T02:58:00.000-07:00

Lately, I had been watching movies a lot. A friend my sis brought this movie called "Once", a musical movie. the songs are really good, brilliant, cool....and the story is very simple and its like a real life documentary of the actors in the movie. With songs, the british accent, it was coool....getting started to love the accent...Its a must to be watched movie...loved it...

Rise of blogging.....

2008-04-03T03:44:00.000-07:00

I am totally in deep thinking as I am starting to blog today. But nothing surfaces in my mind. Just before starting, I was working in office and thought to take break-reading blogs of my friends. I knew my friends had not updated their blogs but found one of them had updated but quickly came to know why he had not been blogging for few months and so on...Then I remembered another blog of a friend which I had never visited. She is good blogger, though, I read some of the postings. The blog was totally about her and her perceptions of life including society and others. I added her link in my blog quickly, as I have the habit of adding friends' blogs in mine.

Then, suddenly, it strike to me...let me blog today...but still now I am unable to think of any good one. I want to put some good post in my blog that means something to me and others as well. Perhaps, this is the reason, I am not able to blog or I am just running away from it.

Now, I have to end my post here. When I started I didn't know what to write but I have managed to add a new post which gives me relief that I have blogged and may be it may be worth reading to others.I guess, though, there is nothing to blog about but with just clicks of few keys of keyboard and a subconscious mind, blogging starts again.

Youth Solidarity festival 2007 @ KU

2007-11-18T00:34:00.000-08:00

Youth Solidarity Festival 2007 was organized by student welfare council of Kathmandu University. There were lots of programs for two days, 16 and 17 November 2007 - youth conference, Music & dance competition, project exhibition, concert..... In youth conference, I was one of the speakers. I was there to talk about 'Contribution of Youth in Telecenter' as the organizer are planning to establish a library and a telecenter in Thawang VDC of Rolpa District, which is one of the remotest and least developed part of our Country. anyway, the other three speakers were prepared and ready to recite their points whereas me, not prepared and my heart was pounding like hell as my turn came near. The three speakers mostly talked about youth and politics i guess... the audiences were excited and lively. As i started, my topic was out of context, i was totally nervous but somehow manage to deliver the speech. And the great ordeal was over for me. but i was not happy with myself and the position i was there...its a great experience and i learned a lot from it....

After that, there was a presentation from a lady about their expedition to Mount Everest. A team of women from different field of life and caste are going to climb Mt. Everest in spring of 2008. It was exciting and fascinating, as I wonder how it would like to climb the tallest mountain of the world. If anyone interested about it, then u can log on to http://www.fiwse2008spring.com. All the best.....

Hero - saves others

2007-09-13T00:01:00.000-07:00

The person with extra-ordinary power and uses to help other is called a "Hero". He was a boy but he possessed the power which will make him a hero someday.

He likes to watch movies in which heroes have super powers. To save others lives, heroes put their life in danger, what he like the most to watch, gives him that power which he posses.

One afternoon, as the rain has stopped, he was walking on the street heading home. He thought many things that he have to quit thinking as he was confused what he was thinking about. He was bored as he walked alone, no friends walking beside him. He was feeling lonely. Suddenly, a few meters ahead, an accident took place. He ran towards the site of accident. A bus and a car had collided head on. The driver of the car seems to be dead, smashed between the seat and the front, bleeding. People around captured the bus driver and started to beat him. The car suddenly was on the fire and the passenger of the car was stuck and unconscious. The fire had grabbed the whole car. The boy noticed that a person was on the back seat of the car. With out any care, he jumped in, he took off his shirt, made it wet with the water collected in the side of the road. He covered his hand with the shirt to open the car's door. He pulled the person out in no matter of time. He took him to the side of the road and checked for the pulse. The person was alive but unconscious. He put on the shirt and asked other person for ambulance. He breathed and thought I wish I could do that......

What was that??

2007-08-08T23:03:00.000-07:00

I was supposed to visit the temple near my house. The temple, what can i say, it is beautiful, the gates, the mirror frames, the top of the temple all made of shiny gold. The place is very clean, no sign of garbage and other stuffs. As I entered the temple, there was a mass of people shouting with foul language and stoning someone. I was surprised to see such a scene in a temple where people come to ask for forgiveness for their sins. I rushed into the crowd to see they were throwing stones at a women who was fully covered in her own blood. The people were shouting "How can you come in this holy place? This is not for untouchable people like you. You've to pay for it dying." I was angry with these people and gathered up my courage and went to cover the women. As I turned around to make these people understand, I was shocked, they all looked like me. Damn, I got up, what the hell was that?? I couldn't understand. That morning I woke up early, very early

Adventure bike ride

2007-08-01T23:48:00.000-07:00

It was fun, excitement when we four frens visited Chovar and Taudaha which lies on the way to Dashinkali. It was unplanned and so it was very exciting, the raining had just stopped and the road were muddy, slippery. Nice time out with frens........

Departure

2007-07-25T23:04:00.000-07:00

Its been long time since i had put up my feelings in this blog. If i start to give out reason for it, surely it would be a long one. so not to bore myself, i am cutting it out.

Last day, July 25, 2007, was a hectic day. The work at the office, meetings. After all this, went to a friend's house, he was married and was going to Australia with her for further study. Was not able to talk with them as their house was flooded with relatives harnessing both happiness and sadness in their eyes. Anyway, got little time to talk, but we're overwhelmed by the situation. There was the sadness of parting and was the happiness of future success. Life's like that. On this day, they parted from us. Wish them a very good life and future.

What's His Plan??

2007-06-07T21:58:00.000-07:00

This morning went through my stuffs and found my cloth wrapped with a piece of newspaper. After unwrapping it, I started to go through the printed letters in it. I remembered it was the paper that I had bought but hadn't read that day and next day tore it to wrap my cloth to carry it. I started to wonder why did I buy papers coz I never read it. Its so funny and waste of money. The piece was" The City Post" of "The Kathmandu Post". There were 2 to 3 news about celebrities. But following story was interesting, different and funny when try to visiualize. It goes like:

Pan's message of ‘slow motion’

- What if the speed of the world stands still for a couple of minutes?

In a materialistic where speed is synonymous to progress, this might be an unusual phenomenon to imagine.

But a youth from South, Kim Pan, 21, is daring to revolutionize the world's speed in his own pace. Pan claims that he is determined to change the world's hastiness by walking rather slower than his passers-by.

On a sweltering Wednesday afternoon, Pan was spotted heading to Basantapur Durbar Square through crowded Ason road flanked by his dozen Nepali counterparts. He was walking differently—deliberately strolling 10 times slower than other pedestrians. Expressing each of his slow movements to the people with his hands gesturing in air, he was responding the inquisitiveness of many gathered around him.

“Hey, it's an amazing experience to walk in slow motion. I have wonderful feelings right now while reading curious faces beholding us,” he gushed with his friends. And his friends were also simply following his movements like a fun game amid the capital's busiest thoroughfare.

Actually, Pan is a promising artiste with a different taste. When he learned about Nepal and its unique culture, he could not relent to come to this mountainous country to share his new ideas of speed to its residents. Then he collected likeminded artists from Lalit Kala Campus and embarked on his slow journey in one of the busiest streets of this city.

On being asked about his “performing art”, he conceded that in his native language, that he wanted to live in his own way, unlike other people hurrying every moment. “You know, people are running after money and never ending longings for materialism. I wish to live and walk on my own,” he said philosophically.

“When I read faces of the people in the streets,” he continued, “It's a street education to learn how people react to our movements, and an attempt to encourage them to live on their own at least for a few moments.”

A camera was even capturing his infant-like steps. According to Pan, his team would make a street documentary—under his direction— to teach the people to change their speed. -It's taken from "The City Post"

He is one different person trying to make difference with his ideas, activities. The big question ,as I always intend to torture myself with, is 'Can He make the difference???' I hope I will get the answer for it

Where are we heading?

2007-05-28T04:41:00.000-07:00

May 27, 2007, Sunday, the teachers with their demands closed Kathmandu Valley. Damn. Was pretty bored watching whole day the TV shows. And it was a freaking hot day, no water for bathing, I was about to be crazy. Could not meet frens. Oh! why? why? Why all these senseless people are giving pain to public (its not only my opinion) for there insensitive, selfish demands.? Why everyone has gone crazy? Don't they know joint effort of all can change our country. Why they are being so selfish? Have they forgotten their humanity or what? And what these so called politicians are doing?-Nothing. Bullshit. Why they are blaming each other instead of working together? Like this we are not heading to our bright future at all. We are driven toward the hell. Thats why we don't like politics.

Book of my past

2007-04-19T20:53:00.000-07:00

This is a small poem - not like so called poem - just the feeling of mine when I went through the book of my past. Sorry to all the poets.

Went through the book of my past,

was a long time since I had opened it last.

Wasn’t like before, some pages had torn,

with tears in my eyes, I realized the time had long gone

Read the lines written by my friends,

tried to remember those wonderful days.

Had a memory of those days like the scent of fresh paint,

Caring, loving, playing, learning, and fighting-how we went

Crowned me with a name at that time,

Never I liked it when they teased me time to time.

Now I try to remember calling me with that name

Though I still hate that name, my nick name

Everyone, in my book, had advised me to be good,

I’ll go forth and do what I need and should

Miss you all and hope to meet you soon,

Coz the world’s so small, but wonder how you look

Happy Mother's Day

2007-04-17T00:58:00.000-07:00

I am sitting here what to write next on my blog, and a thought clicked in my head. Today's Happy Mother's Day. Why not write about mothers.

There would be no creature who don't love their creator, most adorable person of life........mother. She is no less powerful than God. She bears pain to give us the life. She cares us more than anything. She protects us from being harmed. She nurtures us to make us healthy. She teaches us the way of life. She is the only one who knows and understand us more than anyone else in our life. She works hard so that we don't have to struggle. She sacrifices for us to have everything. She can bear any extent of pain for us.

Whatever she does, she does for our happiness. No words can define her, her deeds, her pain, and mostly her love-her wonderful love.

Oh! mother, I've gone astray, gone on the way you did not wanted me to go but I still know whatever I become, wherever I'll be, you'll always love me. I love you too, Mom. Happy Mother's Day.

What if............................??

2007-04-13T02:40:00.000-07:00

Hey guys, you have watched many movies and will continue to watch more. What if it was possible to live in the movie you are watching, which one it would be??

Cooked for the first time

2007-04-08T20:34:00.000-07:00

Last week, I was alone in my uncle's house. Its very nice to be alone in the house for different reasons but one of the problem for me is the food. I don't know how to cook our daily meal and I don't want to try too coz it comes in my boring things to do list. hehe. But to live, I need to eat. I went to hotel to fulfill my hunger and it was very pricey. I thought why pay so much. So only thing left for me to do was cooking.

Oh! how the hell I am going to cook, I don't know, I've never tried. Though many hurdles, I decided to cook for myself. With what I've heard from someone, I lit up the gas and put myself to test. I was successful to cook rice, it was easy. Don't have knowledge about cooking cereals, and decided to cook gravy curry. I cooked it with potato and onions. It took time, but with patience I finished it. It was not looking nice like before. It didn't taste so good, something was missing. But I enjoyed eating the food that I cooked for the first time in my life. It was fun cooking, more like chemistry. Oh! washing the dishes, so many, its not fun at all, no not at all.

What I See??

2007-03-30T02:51:00.000-07:00

Till now, I have expressed what ever comes in my mind and just put it in the blog with out caring that the grammar rules exist. Its freedom, I guess. No one look for that, they look for the depth of the content, the thinking of the person. But I'll try not to make grammatical mistakes or anything else of which I am not conscious about right now.

I have been thinking a lot and lot. The different day's experience made me so. One incident as told to me by a friend, a saint like person came to his college/school and showed them a glass, half filled with water. He explained that the person who sees the glass half filled is optimistic and who sees half empty is pessimistic. Then my friend asked him, what if person sees both. The answer was 'Loser'. Then he asked if the saint was the one. I don't know why he asked that question. I asked myself, as I know glass is half filled and half empty, am I loser too. If its true then more the knowledge more looser you are.

But I am not a Looser. And I guess no one is in his/her own view.

Stupid tester

2007-03-27T01:08:00.000-07:00

I was stumbling and got to give test on how much i am stupid, i was average. Guys u can also try it to see how smart u r. Hehehe....

February still runnin on March

2007-03-20T20:51:00.001-07:00

Last weekend, they were being teased. The Saturday night, SMS-give and take process went for long and the clever cupid shot arrows of love to both of them. Next day, afternoon, they went to date - could not believe at all Coz it was going to fast. Later gather up to feel awkward, and just look each others face and laugh. when she was out, asked him what happened. "Nothing, we talked about general things and sometime we were in silence" he answered.

"So, did you hold each others hands?"
Nice smile and "We are taking it slow."
"So , did you say I love you?"
Again smiling and "We are taking it Slow."
"OK, Fine"
Burst into laugh.

I thought becoz of our teasing, they had built up something for themselves but i was wrong again. They had the feelings for each other before and were feeling hard to express and they needed just a push to start, so we did that, didn't we guys"

P.S.: One bro was thinking about another girl and only knew who she was on the day of date.

You should sing it together this song....

I feel it in my finger
I feel it in my toe.....

Love is all around by wet wet wet

Thoughts, crazy thougths..........mine

2007-03-15T22:36:00.000-07:00

I always want to pour out my feelings in front of everyone so they won't have any problem to understand me. But I can't express with the appropriate words and sometimes making others to think different than what I want to tell. Guess I have to learn to express too. And my friends are always helping me to master it. As I have started about my friends, they are really cool and unique. Don't know the exact definition of friend, but I can tell that without friends, we don't exist.

Life-thought it is pain, simply pain giving me a damn headache, but as usual, I understood it very wrong. A thought just clicked in my mind, I have lot of problems-others have too-but still I think of my closed ones and try to solve their problems or compassionate them in their sorrows. I felt very good about it and my life.

Photo shoot

2007-03-12T21:30:00.000-07:00

Getting Ready

Dare to Stare

I am coming to get 'U'

Ambitious

"Tara Baji Lai Lai"

2007-03-11T20:36:00.000-07:00

At first I was in confusion,when my fren told me about it(only its name and venue of the show). I thought it was a documentary show, later, the day before the show, I found out it was a drama. And the expectation of having a nice time went in air. Its all because it was my first time to watch a drama. Still, I went to watch it with my frens. Reaching there, only I knew, it was organized by LEO CLUB of Chabahil. Like this, many things happen in my life in last moment, and all because of my "don't care" attitude. So, the drama started. In brief if i have to tell u about it then its all about the student life. Though the characters did not change as of their ages, they portrayed the different stage of student life, all the happy, sad and learning moments and what i did not see was the depth of friendship which is the most important part of life (its only my view, I can be wrong in interpreting it). The drama was humorous which obviously made me and others laugh a lot but with that it made me remember my old school days. Most of act in it reflected my school days. Over all, the drama was a hit.

The moral of the drama, as one of my fren told me, is there are different moments in ur life, but u have to learn to live (may be close to what he recited).

Remembering the hiking: Lakuri Bhanjyang

2007-03-06T19:33:00.000-08:00

Was going thru the pictures in network of my workplace recently, saw the pictures of Lakuri Bhanjyang - Hiking. Felt very nice remembering the time spent their with frens. It was my second visit. And boy! it was awesome: AWESOME

Lakuri Bhanjyang, its a paradise. Its about an hour long to reach the bottom known as Sisneri from Gwarko. We reached there around 9 am. Have some chilli chana, egg, tea. Then started the hiking with a local guy, Surendra, guiding us up through the tough climbing (not so tough, but i like to call it tough). All the way up, we enjoyed and certainly took rest for sometime, though most of us were like "How am i going to continue???", the air, the trees, the view, and the togetherness of all made us go further.

We went to the Tower which was not completely made and was very hard to reach there coz the path was too steep. The view from there made us forget all our pain and burden for while. We went to fulfill our tummy's request, the dal bhat, saag, achar, it was like tasty feast for us, we did not wait for anything, just digged in.

Our last destination at the top was the resort up in the hill. A small walk to that place and we were there. It was open, could see all the hills and plains from there without any hindrance (oh there was one i dont know what its called) it was blocking all the view. Actually, three districts, kathmandu, lalitpur, bhaktapur, can be seen. Bad luck for us that day, were not able to see all. Still satisfied with the little view that was seen.

Everyone was tired, i remember how most of us lay down on the ground for some time, it was relaxing.

The hardest part for me i think, coming down part, my leg was shivering due to weakness. oh very hard to come down. When we reached the resort down in sisneri, felt like (no words to describe). Took rest and were ready for the campfire in the evening. Drank, ate, forgot all the pain in our body, played different games. Sekuwa, sab dardeko, tehi pani khaiyo, mitho-tito. khana ta kasaile pani ramrari khaena kyare. then the dancing, all were dancing, headbanging of sugam, dance of nitish all of a sudden, bishal and anjesh awastha. Surprise bday cake (suppose to be).

The time before sleeping, the act of some guys. All ended up good, coz all were good.

Irresponsible-who? him no its me.........

2007-02-27T21:00:00.000-08:00

Yesterday, I was talking with a friend. We were talking about our common fren. I called him irresponsible, lazy -more than me. I know he is but not much like me. Today, it was Nepal Banda (Nepal Closed), have to catch the office vehicle to get to office. Last night, I thought I can get up in time and catch it. So started to watch the movies on cable, it was a nice movie called "Out Of Sight", many times i did not understand the plot still i enjoyed it. After it finished, i started surfing the cable, did not find any good one and the surfing went on till midnight..and thought i would go sleep but for one more hour i started the loop. put alarm in my cell. This morning i woke up and looked at the watch, i realized i just missed the van, shit.........!!!!!! then my inner voice started to curse me again, boy now take ur punishment, walk boy, walk to office and it was far very far. So i walked. I was wearing winter clothes as it was not summer yet, oh! it was hot, but i reached my office though late i reached. And in my mind, i realized i am more irresponsible and lazy not him. Its so funny. Again new lesson in my life.

Student Concession-r they worthy to have it????

2007-02-26T21:41:00.000-08:00

Last time I was returning to my home, the conductor of the bus came asked for the fare. As usual I gave him 2o box and said got card though I don't have one. He asked for the card, I gave him the old one thinking he would not know that it has expired as it was in AD. "Busted!!!!!" But to my dismay, he found it out and asked for more fare but i tried to convince him that the new one is in the process of making. He was in no mood to let me go. and without arguing i gave the rest of the fare. I was not like this before, I would not have done before, but new day always makes you different. I was embarrassed, cursed the conductor but with my inner voice. When I reached my place and was about to get down, he looked at me like he had win the great war, with pride. I hated him very much very much. Later that night, i thought about it, i found myself wrong and he was just doing his job, i asked for forgiveness for what i did, felt guilty and said to myself "ok! boy, you would not do such things again, u would not cheat anyone" then i answered "ok".

The next day, as i told the incident to my cousin, he said "hey bro, give me ur photo, I ll make you a fake card" then i said, "right now, i don't have it. will give next time". See how fast i forgot my promises, and was ready to cheat again.

And yesterday, when i was returning home from my office in a micro, as reached near my destination, the conductor kid, have foul language but told the untold thing which is still hitting in my mind, he asked me, "why do these students need concession for roaming and having fun, the concession should be given to the people who do labor work day and nite just to feed once in a day??" I was speechless, just gave him a smile but was in deep think what should be done. He was asking the wrong guy i think.

The big question to me is that will i give my photo to my cousin or not???????????

Party, Party - it was Party

2007-02-22T21:37:00.000-08:00

Partying was not one of my liking before. It was may be I was not able to interact with people, feeling shy as I am a shy guy, but yesterday evening, wow! I could not believe, I was partying like hell. It was the b'day party of two frens, lucky them. I danced though I had forgotten how to dance well. I don't have that special moves but I danced with all the effort. I was feeling good, not feeling shy, and one thing I hadn't drank much. Not only me all my frens were enjoying the party. Everyone was in good mood. The party ended in that place but continued it with some of us in our fren house. The night was to be remembered, will remember and hope all the frens will as we enjoyed a lot in our own ways.

I think the presence of my friends give me the strength to party.

YTC - A Place to change yourself

2007-02-18T19:42:00.000-08:00

Yesterday, I was there, Youth Telecenter (YTC), two boys studying in bachelors heard something about it before from one of our powerful, intellectual, (don't have more words to define her) friend. They came to check out what's it all about. I explained them about what its all about and what we do. But i think, i was mumbling repeating same thing again and again. I hope they had understood me. Still i feel the conversation lacked the essence, the need of YTC. "Nobody is perfect" taking this in my mind, hey i at least tried my best to make them understand. May be now I can write whats it all about.

One of fren, who is the co-founder of the forum, went to ITU-conference in spain(i think), and he came up with the idea of "Better Nepal", an organization run by the youth of Nepal to use ICT as a tool of development when we were in bachelors. That time, I took it as granted, and didn't think about it very much. Later, I heard due to lack of ICT tools and time, they could not go ahead and have to drop idea. All the efforts went to vain, i thought.

After finishing the degree in 2005, my one year became unproductive in searching jobs that to with out any interest. In betweens i heard from him to join the forum as he had started it again with the same agenda but this time as a forum. But again i did not gave my brain any shock about it. But then it was too much. I don't have a job for a year, i was not studying due to some personnel problem. My mind was dull. I took a big decision to join the forum as i have to shift to next city.

-----First day in the forum-----

I was totally dull and don't have anything in my mind, whats going to happen, what will i be doing?? I met my friend and he invited me as he was very generous and kind. Where am I??? was the big question in my mind, as i attended the ongoing meetings of youth. I just listened to the great ideas to do some youth festival to mark World Youth Day. They were great really great. All seem to be very active, full of different ideas. Oh! my god.... what am i?? what can i do here?? why am i here?? I thought what ability do i have?? I will not be able to do work here. It was out of my interest as i was and am interested in technology. I didn't feel any need of the experience i would get there. I came to know its name was "Youth Information Center" aiming to provide platforms to youth to share and gain knowledge for their own development in turn developing our nation. Its a high profile aim, i felt. Though i felt out of league, as i like to accept challenges, i felt i will try to do my best to work there.

I came across different things there, the vast change too. Youth Information Center was changed to Youth Telecenter with broader and specific objective. Now it was supported by South Asia Nepal(SAP-N), South Asia Partnership International(SAP-I) and Bellanet as it was supported by SAP-N before.

Its eight months now i have joined. I found a drastic change in myself. Before i was shy, dull not much, could not speak in front of mass and many more but now the talent in me is coming to life. But still I need to progress coz i think "I am a learner till I die, need more".

YTC and my friend was with me in my high time and low, I need to be with it in its high time and its low. If not of them, I would be in different place, doing different thing that would not fit in my life. Its a place to change yourself-inside out.

Valentine's Day Gift from God

2007-02-14T00:32:00.000-08:00

14 th Feb, time:around 2 pm, God also was happy about the valentine day or the earth's climate is changing, i was in both happiness and fear of what's going to happen next?? "It Snowed for few time" in Khumaltar, Kathmandu, where my office is located. In my whole life, it was the first time to see snowfall that to live-infront of me. "WoW" Though the snow gets watered as it hits the ground, the moment to be covered with little ice was also a great feeling for me. But i wondered why did it happened, is something drastic change is going to happen in our climate as one of my senior said "it happened after 52 long years". What could be the reason for it? but i don't want to know the answer as i was happy with the feeling of having snowfall live. May be it was a gift from god to me in this day of valentine-my first ever gift.

Irresponsible and taking everything for granted

2007-02-12T19:27:00.000-08:00

Me, I don't have a very good family background though privileged. I know what i should do and what i should not. But still i am irresponsible and take everything for granted. Every time due to my lack of responsibility if something goes wrong, I start to complain myself-why are you like this, you could have done better than this, you could have make someones day. Then i start to promise myself to be responsible, to make things better- i feel good. I start to be responsible and work hard and you know the same loop start again-forget the things i promised myself and start over again. Today, something same like this happened, I complained, felt bad, promised and here i am to write my today's feeling in this blog. Oh ! God make me responsible and hard working fellow, but i know its me who can do that, not even him-he is there to show the way, me to follow, i am waiting for myself to follow the path. so the question is can i follow???

A New Day but still feel Lazy

2007-02-11T23:45:00.000-08:00

Its always a new day. Same regular stuff. Wake up, brush teeth, wash your face, drink tea, get ready for office, same work in office, try to learn new things, chat with friends, go home, load shedding, watch T.V. eat and go to sleep to get up next day. Next day, a new day, but feel lazy to do those regular stuff. Oh! I wish I could do something else, have no responsibility, fly like bird, just go out, run like hell.